The Current State of Affairs and the future of our nearly finished semester...

As promised, the grades for both the paragraph and the most recent journal.


The Paragraph - I was generally very impressed with a few of you on this one.  Some of you got it right the first time, and I barely had any suggestions to make.  A few of you definitely needed a second draft, and I was happy to see the improvements made.  This was an arduous assignment to get through (for me at least), which is why it took a bit of time to manage. 

While it might seem redundant to some of you to be required to post it on your blog after Facebook, I wanted this for two reasons:

1) So I would compare your first attempt to you second and see the changes.

2) So I could find it easily and read with more "aesthetic" appreciation.  On that note, some of you have to consider what the true purpose of the blog is.  Do you enjoy reading grey font on black background that is size 8 courier? Do you enjoy trying to keep your eyes trained on paragraphs that sort of separate themselves from previous paragraphs but not really?  Or even words that break mid-word to a new line because the author didn't bother to check on how things look after "ctrl v" from MS Word?

Probably not.  Many of you don't seem to actually "look" at how your post looks after posting, and "attention to detail" is lacking.  You can't take shortcuts or cut corners when you get to college.  You can't hand in essays that aren't stapled.  You can't be late.  You can't write about the thing you wanted to write about but wasn't included in the assignment prompt.  You just can't.  You have to read the fine print and inspect your work like a meticulous surgeon. 

As well, please stop with the 'single quotations' and the improper formatting of quotes that end up looking 'like this'. And if you write the name of a short story, it is definitely not <Like This> or 'like this'. It's "Like This" and only like this. Not Like This, either.

I docked a percentage point for those of you who didn't post the paragraph the first time, and two points for those of you who were late a second time.

The Reading Journal -  For those of you who did it, and did it on time, thank you.  For those of you who did not.... it's not like I've been working your butts off lately, and it's not like Roald Dahl is Chaucer.  Get it done! Of course, you will be docked and the chance to get above 89.5 for this assignment is sinking in the ocean along with Mr. Botibol.

Generally good work on this one, and I enjoyed all the different approaches to Dahl's analysis of human nature. 

Reading Journal #3: Form a "claim" about Oscar Wilde's "The Picture of Dorian Gray"

For this week, and as a short and sweet exercise before the midterm to conclude this book, I want to do something a bit different and more structured.  Some of you may find this "restricting" and maybe even more difficult than writing a straight-forward opinion piece, but I think it will help you focus on literary analysis in terms of structure and paragraph concision. It works well with this book, as there are so many dualities where one can clearly offer a "claim."

Similar to a fill-in-the-blank exercise, I'd like you to write a developed paragraph (almost like a mini-essay) that consists of 5  lead sentences that will soundly develop your opinion while referencing the text.  You are allowed to tack on added sentences before you elaborate the others if you need them; BUT you must use these 5 sentences and have them appear in this order.  Long paragraphs are "okay" but don't get carried away.  It should come across as a paragraph and not an essay.


Sentence #1:

At first glance, Oscar Wilde's "The Picture of Dorian Gray" might appear .....

In this first sentence, you will get to a direct point very clearly and concisely. Your job is to finish that sentence in your own words with a reasonable "claim" that pinpoints an issue of contention about the book.  Be clear, and avoid being general.

 Sentence #2:

After all, when _____________ .....

Developing the often overlooked contention of the first sentence, you are now going to establish why we need to dig deeper into the subtle subtext referencing the action or narrative of a character.

Sentence #3:

However, .... 

You are now going to complicate your contention with something along the lines of "on the other hand" or "in contrast" etc.  Present a contrasting notion that shows your level of thought.  There are many conflicting things at work in this book, and you have to illuminate that depth of contention.

Sentence #4:

Therefore, it is perhaps more accurate to assume that .... 

Conclude this sentence succinctly with your official claim reinforced.   Perhaps you've illuminated an element of subtext enough to expand your claim. This sentence should capitalize on what the former ones have set up.  

Sentence #5

In this sense, ....

Work towards your conclusion.  Explore it. You may wish to comment on a choice Wilde made, or a literary device he used.  This is your time to sound like Mr. Tame and Mr. Tweedie.

Journal 2 Scores

Very impressive, and better than last time.  In the future, I encourage you all to include at least two or three passages of text to support your claims.  I also wish to see more direct answering of a clear prompt.  It helps your writing become more purposeful and in line with literary analysis.

Again, 500 words and 5 paragraphs without glaring grammatical issues is what you need to strive for as a solid effort. 

	Lovelace	4.44	88.80	90.50
	Austen	4.62	92.30	91.70
	Keats	4.55	91.00	90.50
	Blake	4.56	91.20	90.90
	Bronte	4.55	91.00	90.70
	Kipling	4.51	90.20	94.00
	Dickens	4.50	90.00	88.50
	Chaucer	4.56	91.10	91.80
	Orwell	4.58	91.50	91.70
	Jonson	4.57	91.30	91.30
	Tolkien	4.54	90.70	93.00
	Carroll	4.55	90.90	91.50
	Browning	4.54	90.80	90.80
	Burney	4.54	90.80	91.50
	Tennyson	4.59	91.70	90.80
	Bacon	4.47	89.30	90.50
Class Summary		TOTAL
Average		4.54	90.79	91.23
Highest Score		4.62	92.30	94.00
Lowest Score		4.44	88.80	88.50

Scores and Feedback for Journal #1

Generally, I was really impressed by your first round of journals.  You guys have the right idea, and most of you are balancing analysis, quoting, and personal reflection in appropriate portions.   Because this is a "blog" system, you are welcome to read each what other students have to say, and in this regard I hope you learn more and come to appreciate different impressions.  However, I often feel as if I am reading the same things on different journals, and it is very much as if Student A read Student B's blog, and unconsciously regurgitated the same structure and approach, even using the same quotes.  Perhaps Student A was busy, or Student A needed a model to follow. In any case, I really do not want to feel that you guys are borrowing or rehashing.  You can reference other students and agree or disagree with them, but try and touch on new things if you've read them somewhere else.

Accordingly, because this is a blog system, I can easily copy and paste your work into certain filters and search engines, and find out if you've plagiarized.  I've caught several students doing so in the past, and I wasn't born yesterday.  Be aware that plagiarism pretty much puts a nail in the coffin if you intend to get an A, and it is very easy to detect with a digital, paperless method of submission.  This is another reason why I like paperless classrooms, and another reason why I like a bit of "personal reflection" in your journals.  Straight literary analysis is easy to regurgitate and plagiarize, but genuine opinion and reflection is not. 

Remember your secret names, and keep up the great work! The above is just a warning and explanation.  I think this is a great class so far.

Lovelace	88.80
Austen	92.30
Keats	91.00
Blake	91.20
Bronte	91.00
Kipling	90.20
Dickens	90.00
Chaucer	91.10
Orwell	91.50
Jonson	91.30
Tolkien	90.70
Carroll	90.90
Browning	90.80
Burney	90.80
Tennyson	91.70
Bacon	89.30
Average 90.79